Black Cat Intruder!

An incident has arisen which is of the utmost concern. A new cat--black, only several weeks old--has been brought into the home by the humans!

This is not the first time this has happened. The humans bring home the odd cat now and then, the interloper stays for a week, then vanishes without a trace, and it takes us weeks to return to our normal operations.

The new black cat (temp file i.d.#1890ao.ibb) was brought here in a large cage, at approx. 4:35pm yesterday. The cage was placed in the main water room (the room where J. tried to drown me that time in the large porcelain torture pit with the water cannon--but I was too strong and cunning for her!).

Yes, I am concerned utmostly. This is the same kind of unanticipated appearance that occurred when Sri Lanka came to us. We now understand Sri Lanka to be a KittyNet agent (though frankly I sometimes still have my doubts), but it takes a long time to train an agent properly and if you think I have better things to do than teach from scratch a wet-behind-the-ears kitten the Way Of The Somewhat Peaceful-ish Warrior-Cat, then I just don't know what. And this kind of thing can really snowball. Before you know it, you've got a whole platoon of cats wandering around the dwelling. Even I don't have the leadership skills to keep discipline in a platoon of cats.

Disgusted by the whole thing, I am.

Haven't determined whether or not this small new black cat is in cahoots (anagram for "cat shoo") with the prowling gray cat mentioned in yesterday's report.

Vladia Velocicat--our best "good cop" in the familiar old game--interrogated the newcomer at length last night. Even I thought she was a little overbearing, but I trust Vladia's methods. And out here in the real world sometimes the kit gloves must come off.

Anyway, I've put the whole matter in Vladia's paws. I'm going to eat and sleep and try to not to think about the whole awful business, until I'm absolutely forced to.

--CHEOP

P.S. What if the new kitten tries to turn the other cats against me?